Shoes Off When Entering Home; Perhaps Pants Should Be Shed At the Door Also?

Nine years ago when we lived in Singapore we found removing our shoes by the front door to our home or anyone elses to be a charming custom that was easy to observe.  For one thing Singapore is hot and the cool stone and wood under our bare or stockinged feet was a relief.  But, I'll admit that the cleaned and polished streets of Singapore didn't prepare us for the real reason Asians remove their shoes before entering a home.  As a generalization Asian streets are dusty and dirty;  in Beijing we discovered streets that were dusty, dirty and full of other people's spit.  Yes, big ol' luggies right there on the sidewalks, in the subway stations, and even the on floors inside the malls.  What used to thoroughly gross me out I now view as just a crass cultural habit that likely won't change while I live in China.  So, today removing our shoes at our front door is a habit born of sanitary necessity.

The new twist that I didn't observe much of when we last lived in Beijing (during the winter months when babies are not really out and about) is the pottying habits of  babies and the toilet training practices of parents.  Babies wear pants that are split wide open between the legs and when the little one needs to potty they do so wherever they happen to be:  on the street or in the subway stations.  (To be fair I think the families I've seen promoting this practice in the subway stations were out of towners, and not native Beijingers.)

Perhaps, we now have a reason to consider removing not only our shoes but our britches as well  when returning home from a days outing.  Yesterday, Tom and I had a long subway ride and were happy to get a couple of seats next to each other.  An extended family returning from the Beijing Zoo took up space next to us; Mama and Baby Boy, who was seated next to Tom, were charming and engaging.  Baby Boy watched us and waved when we waved; we said "Ni hao" and his parents encouraged him to say "Ni hao" to us. We asked Mama in our best Chinese:  "Ta you ji sui" (how old is he?)  Mama replied:  "Liang sui" or 2 years old.  Baby Boy was adorable, but he had one feature that made Tom cringe and move a little closer to me, and that was his pants that were open between the legs.  Well, no accidents occurred, but it made us wonder about the subway seats we sit on when given a chance.  Perhaps we should remove our pants at the door as well as our shoes...

Is My Blond Showing?

It’s been a while since I’ve written, and I hope to catch up a bit.  A lot has happened: we’ve had family visit us in Beijing, we went to Hong Kong and had a good visit with Calvin (our foreign exchange son of 9 1/2 years ago; and I went home to the States with the intention of helping my in-laws and of celebrating  my grandsons first birthday.  I no sooner arrived at  home when I called Tom to come home to say goodbye to his dad.  

Since we’ve been back in China we’ve celebrated Christmas and New Year’s, and started language lessons.  We’ve had some interesting encounters with local Chinese as well:  is my blond showing?

I guess I’ll start in the middle because saying goodbye to my father-in-law, Hal, was the last thing we expected to do this past fall.  It was also the most difficult.  The trip I’d planned to the States included spending a week helping Nancy and Hal followed by a week with the Bloss clan to celebrating grandson Ben’s first birthday.  The trip home took an unexpected turn hours before I landed as my father-in-law was taken to the hospital where he and many of the family spent his final days.

I learned from my sisters-in-law about loving care and courage.  l learned from my mother-in-law about grace, unwavering devotion, life-long love and perseverance.   Even in his final days my father-in-law taught me that there is hope and dignity and compassion and love in dying.   From my husband I learned that we should take each day to know one another and not let distance matter because distance can be a barrier to knowing those we care the most about.  We laid Hal to rest November 21, 2012.

On a happier note we had visitors in mid-October.  Tom’s sister Sue and husband Bob (of Kansas City, KS) and niece Alyssa (recently of Paju, South Korea) came for a visit.  We walked miles with Tom in the lead through the Forbidden City and Jingshan Park to the north (6 miles that day), the Great Wall with 1100 plus uneven steps up and 1100 plus uneven steps down (athletic Alyssa is the only one who couldn’t spell “tired” at the end of that day!), and the Summer Palace (another 5 or 6 miles that day).  Tom left for Hong Kong the day before our family departed and without Tom to lead us on, we took a rest.  All we could manage was shopping on Wangfujing Street right outside our door.  We took time for a DVD at home and dinner out.  Sue, Bob and Alyssa went home exhausted, and I traveled to Hong Kong “just plain worn out”.

Hong Kong was amazing.  Even though Tom was there because of work we had a great time exploring.  We caught up with Calvin one evening and he treated us to dinner at a very nice restaurant overlooking the harbor and Hong Kong Island.  Unfortunately, we weren’t able to see Calvin’s parents or girlfriend as they were at an important event at church.  After spending a couple of days in Hong Kong all I could think to ask Calvin was, “what in the world did you think when you found yourself far from this magnificent city and into the wilds of West Virginia?” 

Somewhere, between Hong Kong and Arkansas I learned about the Melbourne Cup.  I got gussied up and attended a fancy luncheon sponsored by the Australia New Zealand Association.  For those not in the know, the Melbourne Cup is a 3 minute horse race that stops everyday life on an entire continent for a day or two. 

In December I flew to Slidell, Louisiana to help my grandson, Ben celebrate his first birthday.  I loved being with my grandchildren:  I really want to be around Emily as she grows up: as she marches to her own drummer.  I never met a happier boy than Ben; and I think Ben takes after his mother.

Tom and I celebrated a quiet Christmas, our 36^th wedding anniversary and New Year’s in Beijing.  We vowed not to be away from family over the holidays again.  We got out to see local sites in Beijing, and focused on one bridge.  We spent several days taking pictures of the bridge and we plan to go back on regularly over the next year.

Life is picking up with language lessons, Bible study and knitting; and of course my weekly adventures foraging for food. 

Is my blond showing?  I’m fairly sure it is…

Tom and I stumbled onto a singles mixer at the Fortune Mall while exploring a way to walk from the subway to a western grocery store by staying inside for as long as possible.  I attracted the attention of two Chinese men before I knew what was happening.  It’s not usual for Chinese men to strike up a conversation with westerns, let alone a conversation with a western woman. 

On another day we went to Taimiao, a temple for ancestral worship and animal sacrifice.  It was COLD and we were bundled up to the tops of our heads with scarves and hats; I felt invisible in my layers of clothing and went on to prove that point by wearing sunglasses.  Still, I was approached by two gentlemen who requested that I pose for a picture with them, which I did.  With all the recent attention I've gotten I had to I asked Tom: “is my blond showing?”  

Wednesday with a Beijing Twist

There are days that should proceed  according to plan because the plan is so mundane.  Today is Wednesday and it should simply have unfolded according to plan,  but today it was served with a Beijing twist. 

It started with a one transfer subway trip to Bible Study with a great group of women. Then a two transfer subway trip to the Beijing United Family Clinic in the CBD to pick up a prescription, and since I was in the area of a DVD shop and the best Jenny Lou's grocery I picked up a few DVDs and did a little shopping.  As I was checking out at Jenny Lou's I spotted Gillette Foamy Shaving Cream in the red can, proud product of the USA.  Tom has been looking for weeks for shaving cream, so I picked up a can.

Now in every subway station there is a security check manned with two guards.  All bags must go through the x-ray machine and if the guards think you should open your coat, that's what you do.  It's been our experience that as foreigners we get only light scrutiny.  Well, not today! The the x-ray screener saw something suspicious in one of my bags, and for the life of me I couldn't figure out what it could be:  my Bible?  oh, perhaps 6 months worth of new drugs! surely, it wasn't the paper towels or frozen pizza.  As I stand there scratching my head I open the bags and they have a look.  Low and behold the guard pulls out the shaving cream.  The three of us have a poorly understood conversation before I get lead off to the ticket booth where the agent on duty laughs hysterically before calling in a more senior guard who explains to me in broken English that I cannot take shaving cream on the subway.  I put on my best foreign and helpless old lady look, only to no avail, then I whimper  "how am I supposed to get home?"  The first guard suggested the bus, now I'm laughing hysterically.

Well, I went back outside into the smog and pollution and I flagged down a taxi:  Wednesday with a Beijing twist.  My trip home turned into a 45 minute taxi ride in the above ground pollution. And a simple can of shaving cream cost 56.80 RMB plus the 26 RMB taxi ride; in USD that's about $13.80.  I think once this can of shaving cream is empty, Tom will just have to grow a beard!

Impressions:  the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

I carry few impressions of Beijing around in my head from 6 years ago.  What I remember the most is that everyday folks on the streets gawked at me with my lightly colored hair.   I also think that the 6 months that we spent in China in the winter of 2006 / 2007 were months of isolated living.  Don’t misunderstand me, Tom and I didn’t sit home by the fire, we were engaged and busy yet at the same time we were isolated from the everyday people of Beijing.  Maybe these days I’m more open minded or  maybe it’s that without a driver to protect and look after me,  I’m left to deal with real people and the best and worst of everyday life on my own. 

I relocated to Beijing with hesitation knowing that we wouldn’t have a car and driver.  However, I am a graduate of Asia for Beginners 101:  Singapore; so I came back to China with “A Little Engine that Could” attitude.  My Singapore background is polite and organized and my China experience is, well, simply different.

I believe the public transportation system in Beijing is a lesson in the humanity of the city:  the good, the bad and the ugly.  After 6 weeks I have limited experience with this system, yet I find it telling. 

The Good .  I’ve witnessed young men giving up seats on the subway to older men; and older men giving up their seats to older women.  I’ve “met” older men and women who try to give me a seat; they are the same men and women who openly acknowledge me with warm smiles and gestures.   I don’t know if it’s because I’m not young or that I’m  waiguoren  (foreigner)  or both.   I know these men and women grew up in a very different China then I see today, and I am truly touched by their grace; it is genuine, and it’s honest. 

The Bad.  All the good that I’ve experience tends to be overshadowed by pockets of bad simply because bad shows itself as larger than life.  To date, I’ve had two bad experiences on the subway.  The first negative experience Tom and I had together during the October Golden Week.  At 7:00 pm we were going three subway stops from home and the capital city was crowded with visitors.  At the middle stop the masses pushed their way into the subway cars in such force that the subway doors wouldn’t close, so they pushed harder into the already packed cars.  I wanted to get out and walk home, but I couldn’t! 

I passed this off to the National Day holiday period, until yesterday, Wednesday, October 10^th, when I found myself fighting to get out of a subway car at 8:45 in the morning.  (No Singapore politeness and organization here.)  I couldn’t fight my way out of the subway car because of the numbers of people pushing with the enthusiasm of a crowd mentality to get on; that is, the number of people who couldn’t wait for the next train that would arrive in approximately 3 minutes.  An older man grabbed my arm and pulled me forward and out of the chaos. 

Okay, I told you that this was The Bad, please refer back to The Good.

The Ugly.   I don’t know how to deal with The Ugly because it pains me too much.   The Ugly are cripples, the lame, the blind, a mother with a hydrocephalic child, and finally today the legless  beggar who pushed his way through the subway cars.  I find that I am not living up to my Christian values.  I am not doing anything to help those in need.  The Epistle of James convicts me to be a doer, and yet I don’t know how to begin because the need is so overwhelming.  I don’t like The Ugly, but it’s in my face every day that I walk out into this city.

Please refer back to The Good.

Everyday Food Life of a New Beijing Expat

or the Daily Food Trials of a Trailing Spouse

Simple living takes longer here in Beijing than anywhere else I've lived.  It’s a fact.  Just putting food on the table can take days.  Perhaps I should qualify that statement:  putting Western food on the table can take days.  It takes days to track down all of the ingredients, but of course I’m starting with an empty pantry.   After three weeks of foraging for food, I finally feel I can get out and do something that doesn't involve securing food.  I've been to more than a dozen different markets since living here. I really don't remember filling my larder being this difficult the last time we lived here.  Maybe age has dimmed the memories; but of course back then we had a driver!

Suffice it to say that since I’ve found the best Jenny Lou’s Market in the surrounding districts, I'm one happy camper: one who is willing to pay a few RMB for that imported bag of grits!  Staples like peanut butter and sweet pickle relish are more precious than gold here, and then there are items like molasses that are rarer than hen’s teeth.  Oh, who needs molasses to make BBQ anyway?  Tom and I are still having trouble finding and identifying soy milk and low fat milk, but I think I'll be okay at the “best Jenny Lou’s”.  I have an app on my phone that reads the Chinese and translates into English which helps me to do the marketing.

Tomorrow I'll take the shuttle bus from the apartment to Carrefour, which is a French hypermarket  or as I have dubbed it, the Zoo.  The Zoo moniker because of the sheer number of shoppers, the noisy company girls shouting into microphones at every isle, and the 20-30 minute long checkout lines.  But, since I need to buy pop and beer for our first round of company, I need the bus to help me haul it home. Otherwise I'd be buying 6 cans here and 6 can there for the next many days.  Did I mention simple living takes a long time here in Beijing?  On a funny note, I traded my faithful Volvo wagon for a two wheeled shopping trolley or a “granny cart”.  I haven't taken it on the subway yet as I don't want to walk a cart full of groceries up and down the subway stairs.

Yesterday Tom and I walked from church to San Yuan Li or the wet market to buy produce.  It takes me a subway transfer and a walk to get here on my own, but no worries for this girl who likes to cook and needs the walk.  The market is a block long narrow building with individual stalls on each side.  These savvy merchants know their clientele and can identify their goods in English and for now are putting up with my non-existent Chinese.   I LOVE this market.  Items within range from fruits to rice with eggs, dairy, meat, seafood, vegetables, fresh herbs, wine, cheese, imported canned items and kitchen utensils in between.  I spent $10 USD on potatoes, spring onions, summer squash, carrots, bell peppers, onions, lemons, cherry tomatoes, mushrooms, parsley, cilantro, basil, and rosemary.  I know I couldn't have done so well even at the “best Jenny Lou’s” and certainly not at home. 

The food saga doesn't end at the checkout counter, however.  Once home everything really needs to be triple washed.  Yesterday, this took all afternoon to pre-rinse out the dirt, wash, rinse, dry and then store.  Using the Clorox wash procedure I learned from my mother-in-law in the early ‘80’s, I wash everything from eggs to produce, including mushrooms, and meats.  Once stored my produce lasts a long time.  When I'm ready to use foods that can be peeled, I peel, even if I wouldn't peel at home.  Again, living takes a little longer here.

The interesting part to me is that I use almost everything I purchase.  I throw away very little.   I think since I work hard to obtain food, I don’t take it for granted; there is no such thing as a quick run to Schnuck’s, or even going into my garden to cut that recipe finishing bit of chives.

Check out Tom's photo blog link to the San Yuan Li market -->  San Yuan Li

Wangfujing

Friday evening Tom and I took a stroll along Wangfujing Street. A long time ago in the Ming Dynasty  Wangfujig was a center for commercial activities.  Then in the Qing Dynasty it was home to ten princess.  Wang Fu means princely residence.  Jing means well, and there was or is a well nearby. This street is within walking distance of the Forbidden City and right outside our door.  Our apartment is in the Oriental Plaza, which is at the south end of Wangfujing Street.

Wangfujing is a famous pedestrian street in Beijing, and despite its antiquity it is made to order for the tourist crowd.  This fact is evidenced by the fact that a short block from the main thoroughfare is a street crowded with large tourist buses.  The street is home to shoemakers, hatmakers, tea shops, the Beijing Foreign Language Bookstore and the New China Woman and Children Department Store which Madame Sun Yat-sen helped establish.  Of course there are malls along with the ubiquitous tourist chop stick shop, Chinese medicine shop and other small shops with hawkers out front inviting the tourist downstairs for better bargains.   In my experience, better bargains mean rat’s nests that are difficult to escape.  The best part of our walk was along the snack streets off from Wangfujing.  The street food is rather amazing, if not nauseating.  There are sticks full of sweet, candied hawthorn apples, and on to pieces and parts that I couldn’t identify...  testicles are a favorite, but I’m not sure from what poor creature they are snatched…  If you’ve watch some of the bizarre travel food shows you know what is coming next in this narrative:  bugs on sticks, bugs just waiting to be bought and fried in hot oil to the delight of purchaser’s palate.  These scorpions and cockroaches are still alive and wriggling; yes, the thought alone makes me gage. Tom took pictures and has a tame video of the wriggling, look to the attached link, if you dare. 

 My farsightedness helps my brain not process too much of this detailed information!

http://tomandmargotsphotos.blogspot.com/2012/09/wangfujing-at-night.html

Dong Tai Antique Market and Yuyuan Gardens

Today we ventured to Dong Tai Antique Market, which is on open air street market. When I say antique, I use the term loosely as many "old" items in these antique markets can be remarkably new.  Merchandise is often made to look old to appeal to the unwise lao wai tourist.  Surprisingly enough we weren't assailed by merchants hawking their wares.  It was a pleasant walk through the streets of the market while  looking for that ever elusive, one of a kind slide rule that Tom hasn't yet purchased.  It is a shame that these old devises aren't valued by the typical vendor and many that we saw had been left out in the elements leaving them in rather poor condition.  

It didn't take long to recall that there is a pace to achieve when walking through shops of this nature:  too fast and treasures will be overlooked and a pace too slow invites the shopkeep to begin the bargaining conversation.  Another sure fire way to start a conversation is to touch an object. If you seem uninterested in making a deal, the vendor may follow you down the street all the while lowering his asking price.  The sad part for me personally is that my eyesight isn't as good as it used to be and it is difficult to cruise the stalls at just the right speed and see anything in detail at all!

We paused on the street corner plotting the next part of our journey.  We must have looked like we'd just fallen off the boat as Tom had out the large paper map of Shanghai.   We were immediately approached by a man offering to take us somewhere. His Chinese was too rapid and my comprehension is almost nonexistent.  Needless to say we didn't tarry long.

We took the scenic streets through local neighborhoods and markets to Shanghai's Yuyuan Gardens.  Produce lined the commercial part of the neighborhood, and yes, you are correct Nancy, there is tea in China!  There was a lot of cooking going on as it was noontime, and we had to take in the delicious aromas as we dodged wet laundry and motor bikes.  

I'd forgotten what an absolute zoo the Yuyuan Garden area is. Masses of people are seemingly just out for a stroll without a destination in mind.  There is a bridge over a large pond that people use to get to the tea house which is in the middle.  It too is full of people going nowhere fast, and you guessed it we had to join the madness if only to figure out the attraction.  The bridge goes to the other side of the pond, who knew?

Tom was ready to grab a bite at McDonalds, but luckily we found a dumpling house and sat down to a better meal.  Like I already admitted my Chinese is nonexistent and Tom wasn't sure his was good enough to order.  As we entered we met a visitor from Australia who told us how good the big pork dumplings were and how to order.  We stepped up to counter to order one basket containing two dumplings, found a table and were immediately served one dumpling.  So, Tom orders and pays for another and it comes, and we think we've paid for two and gotten two. All of the sudden out comes another dumpling, which is okay and Tom pays for it.  Then, just like Streganona's magic pot,  another comes.  Even the wait staff is beginning to think this is funny.  Not sure how we communicated no more dumplings, but they did stop coming.  We paid for three and ate three, we think.  They were good.

I forgot to mention how the Chinese potty train their toddlers.  Simply open the split britches and let the child squat over a paper in the street.  Between this and the spitting no wonder we take off our shoes when entering our house!

Since Tom forgot to bring his camera on this trip, all of the pictures he took are made with my mobile phone.  Check out the link anyway, as even a poor quality picture is worth a 1000 words.  Photo Link